Writers, Dating, and the Imperfection of Human Emotions
How fragile we writers are. How courageous we can be. At any given moment, we can seek enlightenment or fall into the pits of despair.
And yet, still we strive for companionship. Can we writers who question, examine and explore this emotional realm, expect anything but dysfunction from a place where singles congregate online? Especially when cognizant of the gnawing truth that our all-too-human emotions exist in such a flawed state of cyclical change or stop-and-go evolution?
Perhaps a website where singles meet to share and discuss thoughts such as these would be a place where we can venture to expose our imperfections and still hope. One such site that is a favorite is SingleWriter.com, a writers' blog site where meetings of the mind can happen before meetings over coffee take place. Or OkCupid.com, where personal journals are interactive places for expression and comments.
In chemistry, an element is considered stable or unstable according to whether it has achieved a state of completion within itself. An incomplete element either disposes of unnecessary parts or attracts and adds new parts in an attempt to achieve stability.
So why is it considered dysfunctional on a singles website, contrary to the laws of science, to express an interest in finding someone who completes you? Is it wrong, as social beings, to feel incomplete alone?
How do we express in meaningful ways the difference between feeling a lack and desiring more? Isn't it also essentially human to strive for more?
In essence, should we forgo our pleasure, our relationships, the possibilities that present themselves, until we feel we have reached emotional perfection? It reminds one of Sarah McLachlan's song title, fumbling towards ecstasy. Just because there is a tear wanting to fall or an emotion tugs at the heart that seems not quite politically correct enough for prime time, this doesn't mean they are reasons to fear love. Shed the tear, release the anger, then open your heart.
Each heart is a door into the soul, it needs to be open to allow the flow, in and out. Open and allow in the love, accept and process the fear, release the tension, share the joy. Even writers get the blues, but there is thankfully an intelligent singles place where it's safe to risk sharing those imperfect emotions.